Dear Ellen, I’m currently pursuing my Master of Counseling, and during a class discussion, I shared that as a Christian, I foresee some challenges working with clients because of my beliefs. I emphasized that I believe every person deserves to be treated with dignity and respect, regardless of their sexual orientation, and that my challenge is more about growing in competence and confidence to serve future clients well. Afterward, a classmate privately messaged me, expressing that they were hurt by my views, labeling them as homophobic and comparing them to conversion therapy. We had a respectful exchange, and we plan to continue the conversation. However, I still feel a bit shocked and offended by the message, especially the comparison to conversion therapy. I’d love some guidance on how to navigate this situation and any blind spots you might see. – Struggling in the Middle
Dear Struggling in the Middle,
Thank you so much for sharing your story—it’s clear that you’re navigating a deeply challenging situation with a lot of thought and care. I’m really encouraged by your openness, vulnerability, and eagerness to continue the conversation despite how hard this must be.
First, let me assure you that it’s not uncommon for people in your position—balancing faith and professional practice—to feel the weight of these kinds of conversations. As Christians, we are called to uphold both truth and love, and that often leads to difficult, sometimes uncomfortable, exchanges. But you’ve taken the right first steps by being open, humble, and willing to listen.
When dealing with these kinds of interactions, I’ve found that it’s helpful to:
Empathize First: Acknowledge the pain and mistreatment that many in the LGBTQ+ community have experienced, particularly from people claiming to represent God.
Affirm God’s Love: Clarify that God’s love is for all people, regardless of their identity or attractions.
Restate Your Position with Respect: Gently reiterate your belief in free will and each person’s right to make their own choices, even if those choices are not in line with biblical teachings.
It’s important to remember that even when we approach these conversations with love and gentleness, not everyone will agree or understand. This world doesn’t share the same worldview, and that’s okay—our job is not to convince, but to lovingly represent Christ.
In your role as a counselor, it’s important to recognize that it would not be considered ethical to refer a client simply because of their sexual orientation. In a therapeutic setting, your personal beliefs and values should not shape the session; instead, the client’s worldview and values should be the guiding force in your work together.
That being said, it is entirely ethical to refer a client when a situation falls outside of your scope of practice.
Additionally, it is ethical to support a client who, of their own choosing, seeks guidance in pursuing their faith and identity in Christ rather than an LGBTQ+ identity. The key is to respect and honor the client’s autonomy and their worldview throughout the process.
Your willingness to engage in these tough discussions is admirable, and I believe God will continue to use your heart in incredible ways in the counseling field.
